Suze Orman TwitterSuze Orman FacebookSuze Orman YouTubeSuze Orman LinkedIn
View Blog & News List

Karma Is Not A Negotiating Tool

October 15, 2014 at 10:45 AM

I am a big believer in karma. But to suggest that good karma should be the lynchpin of managing your career is not just wrong, but dangerous.

Yet that’s what Satya Nadella, the chief executive officer of Microsoft offered up as advice to working women at a recent women’s conference: “It’s not really about asking for the raise, but knowing and having faith that the system will actually give you the right raises as you go along,” said Nadella. “That’s good karma. It will come back. That’s the kind of person that I want to trust, that I want to give more responsibility to.”

I couldn’t disagree more. Yet in a perverse way I am glad Mr. Nadella brought this issue into the spotlight. That the chief executive of the 34th largest company in the Fortune 500- with profits of nearly $22 billion on revenue of more than $78 billion-said this should be a wake up call to every woman. This was not some outlier start-up entrepreneur looking to provoke. 

Yes, Mr. Nadella backtracked as quickly as the backlash began, but it would be wise for every woman to take Mr. Nadella at his original word. The fact is, whether an explicit strategy or implicit assumption, management preys on women’s propensity to not negotiate, to be consummate team players, to be passive.

One telling academic study reported that women equate a salary negotiation on par with the uncomfortable-and sometimes painful-experience of a trip to the dentist. In the same study men viewed salary negotiation as a game to be won. Okay, so it’s not typically in our DNA. That just means having to make a conscious effort to override what does not come naturally. 

To suggest that good karma is all women need only fuels this this dangerous mindset. It plays into what I see so women hope to be true: that their good nature, get-along, consensus-building nature will be rewarded without asking. That’s naïve. We’re still dealing with a gender pay gap across diverse professions that often has women working at a discount of 20%-30% less than what their male colleagues earn.

So much for karma as a negotiating tool.

Karma Is Not A Negotiating Tool

Mr. Nadella has since communicated to Microsoft employees that he got it wrong. His advice: “If you think you deserve a raise, you should just ask.” In a vacuum that advice is fine. Rather than wait for karma to get your manager to acknowledge your contributions and value, be proactive. The problem in all too many offices is that being your own best advocate often gets women labeled as agitators or pushy. Or, yes, bossy.

And then there’s the art of asking; something women also tend to struggle with. “Can I have a raise?” or “I deserve a raise” or “I am overdue for a raise,” is not the way to go. Where’s the power in that? Ask for a meeting to discuss your compensation; get it on the schedule. This is not some “oh by the way” item you mention at the end of a meeting. In advance of the meeting prepare a one-page list of what you have accomplished. Be as specific as possible. Run through the deliverables you nailed and goals you met (and exceeded.) Then in the meeting you do no ask for a raise. You state your case: “I deserve a raise of at least X.” The phrase “at least” is crucial. You have just set expectations and your floor. You are negotiating from a position of confidence and power. That is going to pay off.

Tag Cloud

switch to spouse coverageFederal Reservesetup automatic savings withdrawprotect loved ones is it true? retirementcollege studentcan you afford itFree Debt Eliminatorbuy homecnbc alarm clockbetter loan dealsstudentpay more than minimumpay credit debt ASAPhealthy teethteach your child good money habits740 credit scorewaive home inspection bidGay RightsLifestyleFICO at least 720401Kmobile appSchool of Social Workborrowing plan one annual feeSuze is my biggest mentorno negativityemployer offered life insurancereduce monthly paymentsavings pleasurepositivecompare monthly expensestitle insurancesummer job match income protect and provide for minor child Long Term Care Insurance 3 bucket approachno sneaking in feesAlarm Clockunder 18 financial giftlower rateearn allowanceSandy Hook Elementary Schoolworst financial mistakeuniversal college accesslower overall drug costterm insurancebuying car 2016housing marketloan is giftcredit utilization rategay marriage ban end Florida Final GoodbyePay Off Debt Before Retirementstaycationno private loanBankruptcysuccessVital DocumentsCollege of Veterinary Medicinedream schoolreal estate mistakesARMsocial securitypay 100% cashface your financial fearOne Wallet At A Timenear historic lows20 year level term home insurancecouple financesunexpected expensepeace of mindannual cost of living adjustmentmental healthbill paying prioritiesStock Investmentsreduce interest ratemortgage2015 financial roadmapbecome member Long Term Care premiumsInflation Benefitmax employee matchMarlo ThomassavingsIRA contribution gifted moneybig results protect your familyalways use all paid time offcar leasingget health insuranceRoth 401(k)Spendingstudent loan repaymentCory BookerconfidentBaby Boomerslong-term care premiumsFinancial Advicepublic service career student loan repayment University of FloridaSave Us Moneykid borrow firstYoung Adult eight month living expense doctors in networkheartachefinancing car max benefit covered!00% tuition paidlower mortgage interestsocial workreplace permanent life insurance with termFRAhigh premiumsmoney vowsteens and moneyFICO Scorekeep a scheduleSuze Orman Scholarshipincrease retirement savingsSuze Orman spouse Kathy TravisFederal Stafford loanhealthy retirement weightPBS Specialsame-sex marriagenon conventional routepermanent life insuranceloan necessityincrease retirement contribution rateearn more on savingsTelepicturesretirement accountsstrained relationshipbreakdown projected monthly housing costlife insurance name trust as beneficiarybe true to yourselfPost-Divorcelow-cost index mutual fundfraudulent returnHeartbe good examplecredit carddon't extend mortgage Veterinary Schooljanuary billsderailed planopen enrollment review Credit Card Interest Raterequire chore in exchange for allowancebuying a carclosing disclosureholiday spendingdo you need life insuranceLegal Guardiandon't cover cosmetic dentistryidentity fraudloved ones dependent on incomepublic service loan forgiveness programswitch to roth 401(k)charges on credit cardhome loan credit score below 740 home ownershipquick closingno tax on withdrawlssidelinedSandy Hook Promisepercentage of women widowed 75-84CD'sburn outlower interest rate2017 Taxescomparison shoppingGiftBankmoney-aware childjuggle multiple financial goalsthree year car loandon't charge a pennyRichincreased auto insurance premiumInterestcommitlow down paymentanticipated salarypay down student loan debtdebit cardlower premiumStudent DebtETF'schildren's bookbuy home you can afforddepreciating asset Swap Older Annuities or Life Insurance High Credit Scorecost of capitalization calculatorspeak new goaltelevision hosthighest possible benefittake actionpush yourself to save more for retirementno late fee required disclosureFederal Funds RateInfluential Celebrityinsurance yearly reviewno fee transfermeet monthly interest on student loans20 to 25 times annual incomedon't spend emotional stakescar loanThe Suze Orman Showovercome financial fearsUS Tax CodeOverspendingpurely financial standpointmarriage financial responsibilityAARP Social security calculatorfinancial argumentsallowance tasktax refund fraudHoliday Seasondon't do five year car loanidentity theftdebtdear suzefamily save at least $100 monthlydon't blow tax refundhealthy youcommunity collegefinancial fearsHSA tax savingsAccuQuote.comMass MutualEmergency Savingshigher insurance deductiblealternative FICO scorecostly legal teach importance of helping othershealthy retirement blood pressureprescription tierstore credit cardsavoid burn outletter to suzemarriage inequalityborrow each year, capitalization is going to pile up LTCallowancelowest cost fund optionsecured cardpaid in fulllive below your meansAmericans don't use all paid vacation timepercentage men widowed 75-84Goodbyegrandchild summer job IRA contributionhigher monthly payment30 year mortgage Student Loanfocus on needsfocus on new truth financial concernFinancial Educatorproperty taxpowerfullife insurancepoint cost offset by savingsPhyllis Shelton expert long-term careget over life insurance phobiaadjust allocations itemized deductionAuto Savings student loan debtnew carnegotiate points with bank or seller2016 adjust estimated taxstudent loan repayment estimatorlong term goal20% equityFederal PLUS loanretirement planprotect dependent ForbesForbes Top 10approved medical 100% tax-freeadd teen40% toward financial goalbuy down Ashley Springeriffy incomeconfident of solutionEric Dodge save closing costs 2% of loanknow before you owepay off debtreal estate marketFinancial Gift CliffCiti Simplicity Card better loan ratesHDHP's are good for youno private loansSelectQuote.comdeath benefit needs for familyno life insurance financially irresponsibleWarner Bros Television GroupMost Influential Celebrities ListConventional loan PMIhigh FICO scoreschedule vacationhome buying mistakesMoney-Savingpreexisting condition not coveredone credit cardSatisfyingcut monthly cellular billemergency fund savingspay down car loanWall Streetmanage student loansno apologyLong Term Care shoppingcredit managementtaxesinterest capitalizationinsurancedeath benefit 20 to 25 times annual incomeroth iraraise deductiblesrolloversecure creditstretch out haircut appointmentsPrime Rate Rise 20158 month safety netget the most out of social security don't buy wantsaffordable premiumCOLA3 savings buckets shop online guaranteed level term policyfederal student loan deferment increase emergency savingsgrandparent IRA contribution not gender specific Moneylousy investmentRevocable Living Trustdental discount plandon't derail retirement savingscollege graduatedebt freeno splurge only offered while employed verify wellness screening and programsgift grandchild IRA contributionpay interest while in schoolbudgetwomen longer life spantoo expensive schoolCredit scoreprovider of financial supportchildren under 18HDHP/HSAage appropriate chorerent vs buyshorter payback periodbad decisionsaffordabilityhome budget after tax costMoney Marketbe kind to yourselfCNBCLTC shoppingGraceenjoy saving Durable Power of Attorney for Health CareCommencementstandard rateexercise reguarlyconsider roth 401(k)co-sign Holidayraising mortgage rates How To Build Creditlong term careFinancial Solutions For YouFinancial Awarenessunsubsidized Stafford loanrefundBill and Pennyemployer funding HSASelfishwrite new goalhealthy gumsInfluentialsgraduationFinancial Awareness Video Festivalis it necessary?loan big picture spring summer 3 step financial road map401(k) Contributionshigh deductible health care planFixed Rate MortgageAmy Lacyetretirment savingsignore 6 month grace period Student Debt CrisisCivil Rightswives should be involved in retirementsmall changes 15-year refinance dealbest interest ratesTeachfinancial aid15 year mortgagecalculate dependents annual income needsincentives for health care wellness screeninglow mileage discountdangerous money seasonworkaholicDeath Benefitdo not pay allowance for good behavior3% debt transferred Washingtonreferrals make saving a pleasureplancommunity bankis it kind?overspend on nights outorigination feeslet them have 50% controlHoliday ShoppingescrowNew York Liferesponsiblecreate new truthnot enough life insurancedental insurance teens8 Rulesresponsible with moneybetter termsfinancial independenceExhibitionLTCi ASAPSuze changed my lifeEasy Life Insurance Suze Orman's Money Warsraise insurance deductiblelong-term care 8 month emergency fundemergency fund NewtownMortgage Credit Availability Indexno retirement funds for down paymenthome related tax break bonus monthly dental insurance premiumFICO credit score credit card mortgagewould you decline a bonus10% donate to charityinitial tax break women live longergift not loanstandard deduction costly insurance mistakemultiple lenders2016 adjust withholdingcar buying mistakesback door Roth IRAChanging LivesUrbana-Champaignage appropriate goalsinsurance mistakewomen outlive mencontribution Jose Rodriguezis it necessaryoverspend on giftsschool 4 Must Have Documents loan no longer than 36monthsphysical healthfile asapfile taxes quicklyrising home pricesmortgage interest tax deductionHDHP ForeclosureFHA loan feesdental savings plansocial security not going brokehigh down paymentno waiting periodclosing feescredit unionvalentines dayeliminate credit card debtmax employer matched 401(k) contributionmaintain standard of livingspecial saving account20% down payment avoid feeslow credit scorefour steps to retirement savings Personal Finance10 year repayment plan monthly benefit don't defer interest paymentscut monthly cable billraise your deductibleMust Have Documentsautomate student loan paymentspresident Obamareduce withholdingCredit Card Rate Increaseyours, mine & ourssocial security never insolventCombo Insurance Productswomen long term careat worst still pay 75% benefitget credit card50 over 50learn good financial choicesHDHP's are not badcompare provider pricingpremiumpay high rate off firstpaying for collegeRetirement Incomeraising interest ratesmortgage disclosureHigh FICO Score = Better RateAdequate Auto and Home Insurancevalue moneystudent loan repayment plansame sex marriage band end Floridaadult childrenno interestFinancial Cliffhealthy aging Giftsoverspend on dining outdon't ignore open enrollmentzero rate transfer dealspaid vacationMinor Children 6 month waiting periodcontribute household expenses accelerate dental workfull retirement ageFinancial Systemritual schedule19 years cash flow problemdangerous retirement plantax ID theftfinancial goal phraseverify retirement plan with HR or plan sponsorretain separate credit cardsrefinanceFinancialFundsBeautyhigh credit score discountCPI-Wshort term goal doctor no longer in networkback-to-school budgetCommunication Skills automatic withdraw to savings home buying seasoncredit reportrepay student loansWillSuze approvedadvice for college graduatesMother20% down paymentLoveHDHP'sRetirement Savingsterm life insuranceonly refinance if it paysleave a legacyGay Couplesultimate compounding gift2015 record year car salesARM CautionAARPFinancial Power of AttorneyStaffords this year have a fixed 6.8% interest rateRevocable Trusthome buying budgetdon't use allowance as bribeUniversity of IllinoisInvest for savings growthkids schedule paymentsFiscal Responsibilityautomatic paymentbalance transfer best loan deal New american Dream Prime Rate Increasegift up to 14,000Suze Ormanbad retirement planningmortgage brokertraditional vs roth 401(k)stay positivesave moneyEmployer Matched Contribution

View Blog & News List
People First. Then Money. Then Things.
Connect with me on Facebook Connect with me on YouTube Connect with me on Twitter
© 2017 Suze Orman Media Inc. All rights reserved.
 |  Search  |  Sitemap  |  Privacy  |  Terms
Sign Up For E-mail Offers
Open Panel
Close Panel